- PEACE- Is it a noun? Is it a verb? Is it both? Peace is to me comfort in knowing that it is all in God's hands. That if He intends it for me, it will be. It takes the load off quite a bit to know that. I may screw up, but He is still the final decision maker and it doesn't all fall on my lap. Peace is also something I work towards everyday. Peace that I made the right decision, peace that God is listening, peace that God's plan will unfold, peace that He loves me and works toward my success not my failure, and in the end, it will all be for His glory.
- RAIN - I love rain! I love nothing more than to sit by the window and watch the heavens open up and just wash away all the dirt! It means an excuse to curl up on the couch with a cup of tea and a good book. An excuse to keep the kids inside and build blanket forts. An excuse to take a nap! Through in some good loud cracks of thunder, and it is just the perfect day. And you can remind me that I said all of this when I schedule a camping trip and it storms, and storms. Because that is what happens to us. Then, the rain is inconvenient! You know, as I write this out, I think, hmmm, maybe there is more to the rain. We love it when we want it and its convenient for us, but if we have outdoor plans, we don't appreciate it so much. It gets in the way of our fun. Much like I love to have God in my life, there to hold me up, wash me off, make me clean as new. But then once in awhile, I am doing something that I know He wouldn't approve of such as gossiping, or watching a movie that really shouldn't be watched, and He nags at me to quit, and I kind of want to swat Him away, because it's getting in the way of my fun. Hmmm. Bina, you have caused me to overthink.
- WEEKENDS - I have a love/hate relationship with weekends. When my hubby is able to make it home, I love them! Its a great time for family togetherness and just doing normal stuff together. All too often though, he has to work, at least on Saturdays, and then, I just want to hide in my house and not see all the families doing yard work together and dads playing with the kids. Because then I quickly begin to feel sorry for myself and wish things could be different. Most of the time, I love weekends, love the break from kids school routines, going out to eat, going to church on Sunday. And oh, Sunday nights fall on weekends. I love those, that is where Steve stays home with the kids and I get to go to the evening service at church all alone! I get to hear every word of the sermon, no one pokes my bottom during the singing, no crayons to pick up at the end, no candy wrappers crinkling next to me, no one needing to go the bathroom...aaahhh.....
- JELLYBEANS - Why? I still don't get the jellybeans but here goes. I love black jelly beans. If there is a dish of jelly beans I will only eat the black ones. You either get it or you don't. Now, if we are talking jellybellies, or starburst jellybeans, let me share with you how I eat them. I will grab a handful, and look at the flavors. Then I proceed to eat my least favorite ones first, saving all of my favorite ones for last. No mixing of flavors allowed! It must be done orderly like that. Its the most OCD area of my life really. Same goes for m&m's and skittles as well. I sought help for it once, but the medication came in different colors, and well, you can see the endless problems with this. Moving on.
- BEAUTY - This is where I don't like my blogdie buddy Bina (say that 5 times fast!) so much. And she knows that this would be the one to bug me. I know she knows it. My job entails making people beautiful on the outside, granted most of them already are, I just freshen their look a bit. First though, I work on inner beauty. A few years back after one particularly cranky lady that blesses me with her presence each week despite the obvious fact that she doesn't like me, made it obvious that I would be graced by her every week, I knew I had to change something. So, I pray for her. While I shampoo her hair, I pray for her. And then I started doing it for most of my customers. I don't know what troubles many of them, but I know we all have burdens, so this is my service to them that they have no idea about. And I pray for our time together and that if there is something that needs to be talked about that the Holy Spirit would guide us through. Now, onto outward beauty. Beauty makes me so uncomfortable. Beautiful people make me so self conscious I really don't get to know a lot of people well, because I am so intimidated by them. I give myself entirely too much credit and imagine how when they look at me are totally picking me apart left and right. I believe that unless I already know you well, 95% of people I encounter in any day, have that effect on me. Not that I can't fake it and carry on a conversation, but I feel that they are judging me and thinking they are too good for me. It is ridiculous, I know that. I definitely have feelings of inadaquecy. Is this too much information?! I didn't mean to be so brutally honest here. I am so going to experience bloggers remorse in the morning! ( Really, God, this is what you want me to say?!)
I have opened it up, my walls are down. Who knew that 5 simple words could tear me down so far?