Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts

Monday, March 14, 2011

Giving In

For as long as I have written anything I have denied being a writer.
I even say it on my profile over there on the right "I am not a writer, I am a talker" And I honestly truly believe this. I have improper grammar and sentence structure and I cannot wax anything poetically. I was pretty sure I knew where my gifts were and weren't. Writing was not my gift. I write like I speak, a jumbled mess that I pray SOMEONE can make sense of and understand my point.

And then I took some time off blogging. Not deliberately, but just lack of time to spend on writing and reading blogs with the addition of Charlie Brown. And during that time I noticed something about me. I missed writing.

I missed working my mind to tell stories of my days and observances.
I missed seeing my God in the small things, because I wasn't looking.
Writing for me, while far from accurate or profound or anything too great, is my...gulp...spiritual gift??

If you have been here before, you know this is a huge struggle for me.I don't pat myself on the back. I don't pump myself up. I do believe I am called to be insignificant.

I sat through the sermon as he said "You cannot choose your talent. You can discover it, and sharpen it. You cannot choose it"
Well. I certainly did not choose writing. I did discover it. I think I am working to improve it. (though I realize I have a long ways to go)

So while I have been protesting any special gift or talent or knowing my place... I may have to give in to the fact that maybe. Just maybe. God may have given me the gift to write. Maybe He really is calling me to use this gift for His kingdom.

I am reading my notes from this sermon and it strikes a cord, knowing that blogging is not the only writing I do. I write weekly letters to a woman in prison... whose baby boy happens to be living here. My notes say this: The focus is to be 'how does God call me to use these gifts?' Not on getting these gifts and shoeing off, but showing  love by using gifts for God. A gift of mercy in the name of Jesus Christ. 

Are you working on sharpening your gifts? Are you still trying to find them? That's okay, God will reveal them when He is ready.



Esther 4:14 For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father’s house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?"



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