Thursday, June 25, 2009

What is going on?!

If you are asking yourself where I have been (I am sure that isn't the case with more than 1 or 2 people) then let me answer your question. This is what we have been up to:
One of my best friends since 1st grade got married this last weekend! Steve and Maicy were waiting during picture time, so were Jackson and I.
And of course we needed to make time for mani's and pedi's! Our hands and feet really did need this! Especially after working to make a machine shed into a reception hall!
The beautiful couple, may God richly bless your lives together! We couldn't be more happy for you! (Unless of course you decided to move that dairy farm back here where you belong!)
So, between running the kids here and there between ball and everything else, and helping to get this wedding off without a hitch, it has been busy around here. A good busy though. And I did find myself feeling a little bit sorry for myself once in awhile since my friend is now living 3 hours away from me. You need to understand that neither of us have a sister, and God so firmly planted us into each other's lives to fill that space. So, it is bittersweet for me, I am soooo happy for her and have no doubts that this is the man God chose for her, yet I will miss my friend being a short 45 min drive away from me.
In other news. There is no news. I am finding myself wrestling with things right now. I feel so completely out of control as far as the future of our family that somedays I just don't know what I will do. My comfort is in knowing that while it feels out of control to me, God has us right in His palm and knows what comes next. But knowing that, doesn't make my insecurities go away. My lack of trust isn't in Him, but in myself. In the missing of a phone call from an agency, why can't they just leave a message so I don't have to wonder if I need to call back or what they really wanted!? Why don't they call my cell phone?! Don't they know I have caller ID and by saying nothing they are really ruining the rest of my day?! Do I call them back? Will I sound like a crazy person, "yeah, um, we aren't actually going through you for an adoption agency, but I see that you called at such an such a time and I was, uh, just wondering what that was in regards to?' I am crazy, its okay. I have come to grips with that a long time ago. (confirmed by the fact that I stayed up until 2am last night to make sure no tornados came through here while everyone else slept-- soundly-- because why wouldn't you sleep soundly, the tornados were over 75 miles away!) So anyway, now that you all can see how neurotic I really am, you know a little bit more what has been going on! Which is again, nothing. Just so we're clear.

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